My Struggle with Love Poems

I struggle with love poems My gift with words seems to become dim and frail When trying to emulate my love story Onto a page into a poem Love poems say shit like "You are the one for me And may this love last forever Im truly in love with you" And thats not what I'm trying to give Im trying to help you feel the intense emotions I feel when he touches me that spark of faith when our lips touch The way RnB plays in my head when our bodies lay near Sometimes this love feel like that black love Screened on television Where viewers will only deem it a fallacy A magical creation scripted behind the scenes Sometimes this be the love you cant even be too loud about you are usually the only one in a healthy relationship in sight The only woman whos heart isnt repairing From abuse Cleaning itself from the mud the rain created last night Healing from the traumas men deflect on to women Thinking an erec-tion is the only thing keeping them leaving Mentally tieing their minds So when they look in the mirror They only hear.. See.. Feel ... Heal YOU And I especially Dont want to be the friend thats like "Yall gotta find a love like mine" I'm the friend That is praying any woman looking finds That man that is willing to listen on how to love her Not a man that can only recite Malcolm X like blood Raise his fist up fighting for the movement Yet does the same against The woman with power to reproduce him But a man that listens Uses the power of his eardrums partnered with his vision To be a student of love learns how i should be held Studies to find the secret ingredient in dopamine To keep that shit bumping in and out of my valves In and out of my body Creating an intertwining connection so divine That when I am with you i feel whole I feel proud of myself and the work we have done together thus far Cheers to the thoughts of disbelief Of whether I was deserving of this Now I think of how this love pushes my being passed elevation This is inspiration How you make me want to love harder each day See beauty and demand it wherever I go And while others dust my love away You carry this shit with imminent pride without a uniform You wear my love stronger than any military personnel saluting to this nations flag You Toss the strips and Paint the stars all over me Saluting to the true foundation of this nation A black woman's body What you do with this body is a form of worship An appraisal of this love we share Thank you for being the man That broke the wall Muthafuckers been pushing me to build With my insecurities and my precious tears Thank you being a man of your word A man of empathy and of praxis You turned this love into a constant form of practice A ritual of partnership My professor always said Listening is a skill That skill found its way in you And raptured me in your intellectualism that took place outside of academia How you take note Of my laughter Of my hunger My emotional inconsistency Yet you stand there Take on all the weight of this world And Still listen on how to truly love me